1
02 september 2010
filmpjes
weblogs

 

Marie Zwetsloot

Marie Zwetsloot

UCM student Marie Zwetsloot applied for a freelance job at Observant as soon as she arrived in Maastricht in 2007. Becoming a journalist one day is something she keeps in mind, though whether she would like to study journalism is another question. Theatre, development or conflict studies – it's all possible. Born and raised in a small village in the north of the Netherlands, she left home early to finish her last two years of high school at the United World College of the Atlantic in Wales. She is ashamed of Geert Wilders but proud of Dutch biking culture. Last year, Marie was a student ambassador in Peru. She is currently on exchange at the Universidad San Francisco de Quito in Ecuador.

weblog

¨Hey! I saw you reading in the library. I read too. Could I have your mobile number?¨ I should start keeping a list of ways Ecuadorian guys have tried to approach me. Whilst in the Netherlands, I might have taken it as a compliment. Here I feel insulted. He doesn’t even know my name. And, for sure, I am not the first blond girl with blue eyes he has tried with.

On the streets, it gets out of hand. Lots of cattle calling, men asking whether they can give you a ride, occasionally you’ll get touched. Even police men join the party. A friend of mine had a man screaming ¨I want to fuck you¨ the other day. That’s crossing a line.

Yet, their gentleman-like behaviour is the most offensive of all.  At least, for an independent Dutch girl: ¨No, you don’t need to carry my bag. Yes, I know how to get home by myself. Thank you, that’s very noble of you but I don’t need your jumper. It’s still 20°C outside. And I brought one myself¨.

At the moment that they could actually come in useful, they miserably fail. On my hiking trip last weekend, our teacher and Ecuadorian male students suddenly disappeared into a pub to watch football. It was 7 o’clock at night. We had just swum in a river. Mosquitos everywhere. I got an awful cold and don't get me started on the mosquitos bites. 

The guys in my Agriculture class don’t score higher. We have practicals on a farm every week. Yesterday, our task was to weed the onion and carrot fields. What did they do? They sneaked out and ate mandarins for two hours. Afraid of getting their hands dirty. 

So this is to all of you guys. Keep on trying. You’re scaring me away. And that smile on my face doesn’t mean I am into you. I am laughing at you and your 'manly' manners.   

Reacties

Andreas
vrijdag 25 september 2009 13:18
Although my Indian experience as a male is very different from Marie's Ecuadorian adventures as a female, one common thing in the particulatities we face in terms of social interaction might be the role of body language to which smiling belongs as well.
Here in India, saying 'no' while still smiling, one confers an ambiguous message to the recipient of the communicative act. He or she is tempted to interpret your smile as an indicator that you want to say yes, but you are shy or undecided still. The solution is a rather grimm one since it basically requires not to smile in certain situations which apears to us maybe disrespectful or arrogant, but which makes the 'no' much clearer and straightforward.
Still, how could I dare give an independent and self-conscious Dutch girl, who finds her way around very well, any advice while never having experienced her subjectivity myself in the first place? Its just a thought on the commonalities of our experiences.

Reageer

Naam (verplicht)

E-mail (verplicht)

Website

Enter the code shown above:

specials  |   paarltjes  |   rss  |   UM agenda  |   contact  |   adverteren