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Some self-care

Some self-care

I meditate daily. I know, it sounds oddly nerdy. My own prejudices towards meditating people were cruel. In my ignorance I thought of them as esoteric freaks. A little bit Buddhism here and an occasional sprinkle of Hinduist terms there – voilá! A new - arguably - revolutionary lifestyle was born. Which is not really accurate. By now companies discovered mindfulness for their employees as a way of productivity maximization. Sport centres offer meditation sessions at every corner for the common mindfulness newbie and you can get all the positive benefits without the far-Eastern romanticism.

Not that I am an expert. I am astonishingly bad in being mindful since I struggle to sit still and just focus on one thing for more than approximately 30 seconds. The most reliable indication that I need this.

Getting more into it, I discovered that mindfulness is actually a real hype among people who are a little bit older than I am but still to be considered in my generation, millennials. It becomes this celebration of the one and only right way to live in a generation that seems to constantly fear the moment when they are bed-ridden, waiting for their death of a mysterious, incurable cancer and feeling most and foremost regret. Post-FOMO, the moment you already missed out on things and cannot catch up anymore. And I only wanted to tame my goldfish-attention span… It is so much more than that, as it seems. When you do not meditate at least once a day for a couple of minutes or do some yoga you just don’t know how to live correctly. It will come back to you at some point when you scatter under the almost obligatory burnout in your early 30s. Only the expensive version of mindfulness in a fake-Indian ashram somewhere in some out-of-civilization type of Dutch village in form of an intensive crash course will get you on track again. As naïve as I was, I couldn’t imagine where I got myself into! The stress-alleviating practice becomes  a stress-factor itself, missing out on a meditation session becomes a failure that burdens you and whole internet forums are full of people concerned whether they do this mindfulness thing right.
Why do I do this again? I kind of forgot, but writing this made me anxious, so I am going to take some joss stick self-care time in my mindfulness forum of trust.

Asena Baykal

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