I come from a time when the dentist pulled up in front of our primary school in a mobile dental van, causing at least half of the children in my class (myself included) to break out in a cold sweat. Our school dentist and his assistant were not exactly known for their gentle approach. Sitting in the van, waiting our turn, we could hear the drill being used. We were called in by a big man in a white coat who never said much, but still made it abundantly clear that we shouldn’t whine, whether it hurt or not.
After primary school, I didn’t visit a dentist until halfway through my student years. I was afraid. It wasn’t until I had a toothache so severe I could no longer function that I called a dentist who, in addition to having his own practice, taught in the dentistry programme at the university in Nijmegen. He was not only young and kind, my friends assured me, but also very good at putting anxious patients at ease. And they were right. He listened to my story, then told me exactly what was going to happen – all under local anaesthesia – and how much time it would take, and that just one signal from me would be enough to pause the procedure. I would’ve liked to mention his name here by way of tribute, but I’ve forgotten it.
Unfit
This memory resurfaced when I read my colleague MT’s article about medical students who are unfit to be doctors. Here at the Observant office, people started rattling off examples when I asked them about their bad experiences with doctors. Examples of doctors being blunt, impatient, skipping ahead in their explanation and then becoming irritated if you don’t follow them, unprepared, staring at their computer screen while you talk, and so on. Fortunately, they cited lots of positive experiences as well. With general practitioners, for example, who seem to genuinely take their time for you and listen to you, even if their waiting rooms are full of patients. Or specialists who give you their telephone number in case you have any pressing questions in the evening.
It goes without saying that a doctor must know what they’re doing, but you will never be a great doctor unless you have strong empathy and social skills. And this doesn’t only apply to doctors, we quickly concluded here at the office. In fact, are there any jobs that don’t require interpersonal skills? You always have to deal with colleagues (even if you’re self-employed), which means discussing things, brainstorming together and giving feedback. But also – very importantly – showing interest in each other.
China shop
Take our own profession. A journalist with poor communication skills will certainly have a hard time. We get our information by interviewing people, sometimes about highly personal matters, sometimes about organisationally sensitive issues. Going into an interview like a bull in a china shop hardly inspires confidence. You’ll just leave without a story, or at least without a good story.