Imagine walking into your room after being in another country for nearly half a year. You sublet it to a friend you had trusted, thinking it would be fine. I had been in Japan for the past five months, and I came back to Maastricht last weekend. I didn’t expect much. All I wanted was the quiet comfort of my own room.
When I opened the door, all I saw was a messy, dirty room. Drastically changed, in a bad way. It didn’t look like my room anymore. Trash had been left behind, not even in proper garbage bags but in huge, random ones, so I had to move everything myself. While doing that, I came across something deeply unhygienic that had been carelessly discarded. I found myself just standing there, completely speechless.
It got worse when I started cleaning the storage. Things I had once given or entrusted to someone else had all been returned without any explanation, including opened food. There were insects. And then I found a dead mouse. At that point, it wasn’t even just shock or disgust, but pure exhaustion. I’m incredibly grateful to my friends who helped me clean and organise the storage. I genuinely couldn’t have done it alone.
On top of all this, the person I sublet my room to hasn’t paid rent for the last two months. She didn’t explain why, but just had ghosted me until a couple of days ago. Because it was a private sublet, she was supposed to pay me directly. I tried to be understanding. I know people can struggle and have their own problems. But paying rent and leaving a room in a clean state are basic responsibilities.
I experienced much mixed feelings. Until this happened, I had never cried out of anger before. But more than anger, I felt disappointed that someone who I thought of as a friend could have done this to me. I tend to trust people too much. Afterwards, I came across a quote that helped me cope with the situation: it’s important to define your boundaries in advance, what you will not tolerate no matter who the person is. When someone crosses that line, you are allowed to feel angry. And so I did.
Yuki Nakamura